Jack: The Early Years
Having come across a photo set of one of my fellow bloggers with pictures of herself as a little girl (hello Shannon!), I thought it was about time to dig out ThePickards family album and prove that I’ve always been gorgeous.
Okay, maybe in this photo I’m not looking my best, being bald and toothless (you enter the world without teeth or hair, and if you hang around long enough, you leave it the same way), and also in black and white.
I think that’s the thing that’s disturbing me here: I’m upset that someone is taking my photo with a black and white camera, when obviously I want a proper colour one. And I’ll scream and scream and scream and scream until I get one.
By the time of the next photograph, we’ve obviously got colour, which is much better.
They’ve also discovered how to stop that loud noise coming out of a small child’s mouth — place food in it. In this case I appear to have half a loaf of bread which I’m nibbling on. It’s proving to be a bit of a mouthful and I can understand why people refer to ’sliced bread’ (as in “the best thing since…”) as being such a wonderful invention.
Look at that. What an angelic child I must have been. It’s no wonder I grew up to be so universally loved and adored. (Please note: for your comfort and convenience, any dissenting voices will be ruthlessly stamped out.)
One the one hand, this photograph simply shows an indulgent father allowing his one-year old to play with his typewriter (I remember that typewriter, incidentally — it lasted a good few years after that). But look closely and a different picture emerges…
I mean, just look at that Zapata moustache. It’s just like, soooo 70s. I mean, it was the 1970s, so I guess that would excuse it to some extent…
And then we move into school days.
My very first school was Lindisfarne Primary school, which was in the centre of Gateshead (see map). As far as I recall, there was no specific ’school uniform’ at the time, but with it being my first day at school, I was beaten, cajoled, and bullied into wearing a shirt and tie* and posing for a photograph.
*in the interests of strict accuracy levels of beating, bullying and cajolement may have been around zero, but there’s no need to let that get in the way of the story.
Sadly, Lindisfarne school no longer exists. Also, I hate wearing ties.
Unfortunately, by the time I was 11 and had to go to ‘big’ school, the tie was no longer an optional part of the uniform. Here’s me in the front garden of my Grandma’s house posing for the camera in my school uniform for Lyndhurst Comprehensive school (again, with map location).
Sadly, Lyndhurst School no longer exists. At least, not as a school. As far as I know the building is still there (but it’s been a few years since I’ve been past it). Lyndhurst School took children from the ages of 11-18 (although the 6th form wasn’t much to speak of) but after 3 years I changed school because I wasn’t impressed with the GCSE options given to me, and also one of my mates was changing schools at the time which also gave me the impetus to go to…
…Heathfield Senior High School (map location), where I made a lot of friends, many of whom I still see regularly today. Sadly, the school no longer exists, having been knocked down to build some houses.
What? You noticed that too, did you? Yes, it would appear that I seem to be some sort of jinx for schools that I have attended (although in the case of Heathfield, it was actually part of a two-tier school with ‘Breckenbeds Junior High’ and ‘Heathfield Senior High’ on different sites, which merged back on one site — the Breckenbeds site, where it is still going, under the name of ‘Joseph Swan’).
So in answer to the questions that you have all been deluging me with, yes, I always have been this stunningly handsome. I’ve had people throwing themselves at me (well, sometimes they’d throw other things at me, but I knew what they really meant) for years…
And a little research has revealed the following information about my school ‘jinx’:
- Lindisfarne Primary (Infants)
- Attended for about 2 years (school closed July 2007)
- Altmore Infants
- Attended for about 1 year. Still open
- Lathom Junior School
- Attended about 2½ years. Still open
- Lindisfarne Primary (Junior)
- Attended for about ½ year (school closed July 2007)
- Glynwood Primary
- Attended for about 1 year. Still open
- Lyndhurst Comprehensive
- Attended for 3 years. (school closed approx 1998)
- Heathfield Senior High School
- Attended for 4 years. (school closed approx 1998)
So that’s really only 6 different schools attended, half of which are still open some 15 years after I left school (and 20+ years after I left those schools). Looking at it that way, I don’t seem like quite so much of a school jinx…
Hello. I am 
Loved ‘em! And yes, highly suspicious about the schools burning, er, I mean closing down. I love the pose you have going on in your school uniform. I fully expect 11-year-old you to pull out a saber and start fencing.
Just two comments- isn’t half a loaf better than none? and… you insisted on having a tie for your first day at school- it was on elastic round the neck, ha ha- that’s your street cred ruined!!!
Street cred? You obviously don’t know me very well…
And like I said, I was beaten, bullied and cajoled into wearing said tie. You should simply ignore anyone telling lies and attempting to rewrite history
the buildings at lyndhurst have been removed one at a time over the last few years. they are starting re-building now.
cleveland hall boys club moved into the site, good for schoolboy sunday football nowadays.
My old building now appears to be a scrap of scrub to one side of a car park.
http://tinyurl.com/5vosyd