Newcastle’s Spanish left back, José Enrique, is apparently currently pondering a question which The Clash posed back in 1982…

Should I stay or should I go?The Clash

It would appear however, that either his mind has changed significantly over the course of only 22 minutes, or that various media sources are speculating and having fun in doing so…

In chronological order then:

At 15:44, the Sky Sports headline tells us “Enrique Set for Toon Stay”. Fast forward six minutes and suddenly he’s not so sure, as 4thegame tell us “Enrique ponders Magpies stay”. Only four minutes later and he’s still wavering, but now heading more towards the exit with TEAMtalk’s “Enrique would consider Toon exit”. Finally, twelve minutes after that, it would appear that he has finally made up his mind, as the Independent tell us: “Enrique signals desire to leave Newcastle”.

Is it really possible that he has changed his mind so drastically in only 20 minutes? And if not, how exactly can you get such a wide range of views? How many different interviews did he give?

Again, working through it chronologically:

I like the city and I am very happy in England, but that doesn’t rule out that I will study an offer that could arrive. Today, I see myself playing next season at NewcastleJosé Enrique, quoted on Sky Sports

Now this doesn’t necessarily imply “Toon stay” to me: he says he will study offers. But nor does it imply “I’m off”; he says he’s happy and currently he’s expecting to play for Newcastle next season. Fair enough. Well what was it he said to 4thegame, then?

I like the city and I am very happy in England, but that doesn’t rule out that I will study any offer that could arrive. Today, I see myself playing next season at NewcastleJosé Enrique, quoted at 4thegame

Now I don’t know about you, but I can see some similarities between the two quotes… what about TEAMtalk?

I like the city and I am very happy in England, but that doesn’t rule out that I will study any offer that could arrive. Today, I see myself playing next season at Newcastle.José Enrique, quoted at TEAMtalk

And inevitably, if you look at the Independent, you get the same quote again:

I like the city and I am very happy in England, but that doesn’t rule out that I will study any offer that could arrive. Today, I see myself playing next season at Newcastle.José Enrique, quoted on The Independent

Now the first thing that springs to mind is how is it possible that journalists could interpret the same quote so differently? And to return to a question I asked earlier — how many interviews did he give? The answer is of course one; they have all quoted the same interview that José Enrique gave to the Spanish Marca.

The third thing is that it does not appear they’ve not all taken Marca as their source. In Enrique’s interview with Marca he says (excuse the horrible babelfish translation, but you get the gist):

He is very hard mainly by the liking that in each party 55,000 people filled our field and they did not stop to animate at any momentJosé Enrique’s Marca interview, translated back into English by Babel Fish [1]

Now I take this as a reference to 55,000 fans — “who don’t stop cheering”, as one of the other headlines had it. Only the two articles which reference this have both corrected the figure to 52,000. Why correct it to that? The average gate was around 50,000. What are the chances both would have independently arrived at the same correction — and surely as it’s reported speech, it shouldn’t have been corrected anyway?

Or do journalists think it’s fine to correct reported speech if it doesn’t match up to what they expect? If so, that is rather worrying…

But that’s enough of poking fun at the speculatatron device that seems to power the football section of British newspapers. Let’s see if we can work out what else Enrique said to Marca that hasn’t been reported elsewhere…

And why did Enrique think Newcastle got relegated, anyway?

We have only gained seven parties in all the season and that for a club as the Newcastle is very hardJosé Enrique’s Marca interview, translated back into English by Babel Fish [2]

I am presuming this is a reference to only seven wins. If by some chance it has been translated correctly, I have some concerns about his attitude…

So what does he think about Alan Shearer, and the rest of the managerial merry-go-round, then?

If he lets himself work to Shearer the thing he will change better. He is a trainer who can do something great by the Newcastle and is necessary to give time him. I believe that if lets to him work in a long term project it can do something very good by this equipment. [...] We have had four trainers this season and have been moments that we have not had nor trainer. The things have been made badly from the beginning but I hope that all this changes better. I believe that with Alan Shearer in the bench that change is possibleJosé Enrique’s Marca interview, translated back into English by Babel Fish [3]

Right: I think I can read that as he thinks Alan Shearer is a decent manager who, if given time, will do well for Newcastle, and the times when we haven’t had a manager hasn’t exactly helped…

Well, that’s certainly an interesting interview José — although I think the fact that it has been badly translated back into English by Babel Fish has probably added to the fun — but before we go, can you tell us what you think of the Newcastle fans?

The people of are incredible here. She has always supported to us and it has been a wood them to lower to the Championship. I put 10 to them to the liking, but 11 is deserved.José Enrique’s Marca interview, translated back into English by Babel Fish [4]

Yes, it has indeed been a wood to us to be lowered to the Championship…

So remember, if you want to hear what José Enrique actually had to say, instead of listening to the words of football writers who are capable of drawing four different conclusions from exactly the same piece of information, take a look at his actual interview. But do yourself a favour, and get it translated properly…

*grins* I’ve not had so much fun with a football story since Marouane Chamakh last year!