I am a Newcastle United fan. I have been a Newcastle United fan before I was even interested in football: during my childhood I remember a spell where I couldn’t stand football at all, but was still absolutely convinced that if I was going to support a football team, it would be Newcastle, because that’s where I’m from. Well, almost, I’m from Gateshead, but I support them too, and they’re not likely to meet in the league for a couple more seasons at least.

But to some extent I’m turning my back on Newcastle United at the moment. The club is a joke. For the entire last season, fans of opposing teams (many — but not all — of which support teams which aren’t necessarily where they are from, but — and no doubt entirely coincidentally — just happen to be successful and fashionable teams) have had great fun aiming barbs at Newcastle and their fans.

And what’s really unfair about the whole thing is that there isn’t much the Newcastle fans can do about any of this. All of the laughs aimed at what a joke the club is, how in many cases the behaviour of the players has dragged the clubs reputation through the dirt; how players don’t actually seem to care about the club or the fans but do care about picking up; how the team is basically a pile of crap; and how Newcastle fans are so stupid they will buy a revolting away strip: there’s not much to argue about there, because they are of course correct.

And, certainly as far as Sunderland are concerned, however painful it might be to admit, it probably is their turn to laugh at us. After all, we’ve had a few goes at them…

When Ashley arrived, it seemed to be a new dawn. No more Freddie Shepherd. Some people have suggested that they might want Shepherd back. No, no, no. Remember this. Newcastle fans deserve better than Shepherd.

Unfortunately, it also appears that we deserved better than Ashley. Personally, I don’t really have any objection to my football club being the plaything of some rich man. However, and I’ll stress this, because I think it’s important, as said plaything, I would expect the rich man to want to nurture and care for the club, rather than hide it in a corner and allow it to rot.

And unfortunately, irrespective of what intentions Mike Ashley had when he took over, he’s made an awful lot of mistakes. He’s gambled, and lost, repeatedly.

I’m not going to go over his mistakes in detail: we all know them, so I’ll just summarise: no due diligence, no communication with fans, backing Wise’s judgement over Keegan’s, trying to sell the club and appoint a new manager at the same time (which led to Chris “t, it’s” Hughton and “you must be” Joe Kinnear), not seeming to realise that if you sell all of your good players and don’t replace them, the quality (and indeed team) will go down, and then of course allowing that away strip to be chosen.

I mean, how bad must the other designs have been, if the club thought that was the best?

I’ll digress slightly here. I feel sorry for Chris Hughton. I don’t think he’s good enough to be Newcastle United manager. But nor do I think that’s his fault; he’s stepping into a job while it is not being given to anyone else and doing his best. For this I think the fans should thank him. Otherwise it’d probably be Llambias taking training.

But Ashley’s continuing to gamble not only with our beloved Newcastle United, he’s gambling with his own money. He originally seemed to want £400 million for the club. With relegation, he’s had to knock around three quarters off that value. Of course, if he’d actually been prepared to pump in around £25 million in transfer money over the season, we could probably have stayed in the top flight. He’d still not have got £400m, mind you, but the club would be worth more than it is now…

And now he’s making the same mistake again. It would appear that he’s playing “I’m in a huff, so I’m not doing anything at all until someone buys me out”, while at the same time playing “if you don’t give me all the money I want, I’m not going anywhere”. Which could well end up with Newcastle paying out more wages than they need to by not selling the big-money so-called ‘stars’, getting off with a really bad start to the season, finishing up in administration and relegation to League One.

And then he’d be lucky to get £100 for the club. He either needs to invest, and actually start something moving now, or simply accept whatever is the best offer on the table right now. Otherwise he’s going to gamble and lose again, and again the fans will suffer. The players will still get paid; the directors will still get paid; the fans will still get shafted.

And that’s why I am refusing to hand over a single penny of my money to anything officially Newcastle United while Ashley is the owner. I have not renewed my season ticket; I will not attend any games; I will not buy any merchandise because providing any money to the Ashley regime only decreases the rate at which the value of his investment is haemorrhaging.

And I think the faster he’s losing money, the more likely he is to sell.

Hmm. On second thoughts, that might not work. He might well gamble again, hang on in there, and gamble that if we sell any and all of our saleable players, Shola Ameobi will somehow score 90 Championship goals and we’ll win promotion. Which of course we won’t. We’ll end up in administration and League One.

But I’m not going to stick around and watch either of those scenarios unfold. I don’t see why I should pay out money to watch something I have not been enjoying for the past two years (“come and pay £30 for ninety minutes misery and frustration!”). I don’t see why I should help contribute to the wages of those running the club, when they were so quick to cut jobs for local employees.

In any other relationship, if one party treats you like dirt, you’ll leave them. Supporting a football club isn’t that different. You’re not going to fall in love with another, but until they learn to start treating you with the respect you deserve, you’re not helping them by remaining in that destructive relationship. They have to have a reason to change.

But more than anything else, I have no desire to watch, or to contribute financially to, our club being ground further into the dirt by people I do not want running my football club. I simply don’t trust them to do a good — or even halfway competent — job of running it. I’d be wary about asking them to run a tap. Of course, if there are any lawyers reading, I’d like to stress that I am simply illustrating my personal opinions here…

So I’m turning my back, and I’m not listening, for as long as Ashley remains in control. But when this changes — and regardless of which division we’re in by then — someone please do give me a shout when it’s over, will you?