Twitter Sexuality Tester
Now I have up to now been relatively assured of my own heterosexuality. I’m married, I have children, and I find women attractive in a way that I don’t find men. These to me are all indicators of heterosexuality (not the same thing as ‘predictors of beaconicity’, for any local government types). And as I say, up to now, I’ve generally taken this together — and most specifically the ‘fancying women’ bit — and arrived at the conclusion that I’m heterosexual.
You’re confusingly hetero. Your friends know. Your family know. You’re probably the only one who isn’t sure on where you stand.
Only now I’ve just taken a test from Stockholm Pride which analyses your twitterstream and attempts to work out how heterosexual you are, and it reckons I’m 55% hetero, which I’m not entirely sure how to interpret. Am I as camp as a row of tents, or is it just that part of me is a lesbian trapped in a man’s body? Some how I really can’t imagine that people perceive me as camp, but maybe those following me on twitter do…
Does it think that I’m a bear? I could maybe just about manage the working class masculine image, but I don’t really fancy tattoos and piercings, and somehow I don’t really think I’m cut out for the tight white t-shirts type. I do like Kylie and the Pet Shop Boys, but there’s no way you’re going to get me to watch Will And Grace.
To be honest, I really am fairly certain I’m straight — does anyone know what the official ‘pass’ mark is? And whether or not you can do a re-sit if you’re not happy that you’re straight (or gay) enough?
And is this something I need to tell the wife?
Seb Crump says:
July 19th, 2009 at 8:29 am
I am, almost depressingly, 91% hetero according to that. Seemingly because I mention cars and wow (which they are probably assuming means world of warcraft, which it certainly doesn’t). I would have thought all your mentions of beer and breweries would have you far more into the hetero balance… but apparently you mention ‘pretty boy’, which probably tips you way the other way.
Strangely when I ran you again this morning you were 62% though… been manning yourself overnight? although expressing it like that probably wouldn’t move you in that direction!
paul canning says:
July 19th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
“camp as a row of tents”? It’s camp as a row of PINK tents!
There was another test I saw on Twitter where you answered questions, which seems more ‘scientific’ … damned if I can find it now …
(BTW makes me 1% hetero, gulp)
Twitted by Tweet4Traffic says:
July 19th, 2009 at 7:15 pm
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July 19th, 2009 at 7:23 pm
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Justine says:
August 7th, 2009 at 9:03 am
You’re taking that way too seriously. This test doesn’t even begin to determine what your sexual preferences are; I don’t see why you should suddenly start questioning yourself just because your twitterfeed seems to think you may be 55% hetero.
JackP says:
August 7th, 2009 at 9:37 am
…ah, Justine, you’re taking this post too seriously. Unless of course I’m taking your comment too seriously
Although on taking the test again, I’m now 62% hetero.
Or is that all just a beard?
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